Day 34

Monday, April 7th

Rather than condemning ourselves for our weakness and making self-conscious efforts to try harder, we can allow the Crucified to love us in our brokenness. There is no way of healing from the wounds each of us carries except through the love of Jesus that forgives seventy times seven and keeps no score of our wrongdoing.”

 -Brennan Manning (The Signature of Jesus)

“This is what God does. He gives his best - the sun to warm and the rain to nourish - to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty.

If all you do is love the lovable, do you expect a bonus? Anybody can do that. If you simply say hello to those who greet you, do you expect a medal? Any run-of-the-mill sinner does that.

 In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you.”

(Matthew 5:45-48 MSG)

We are all in process. Letting God chip away at our hearts of stone and replace them with hearts that are softer towards our fellow man is the journey we are all on as followers of Jesus. But to be outwardly gentle, we first must learn to be gentle with ourselves. 

 There was a season in my life when I was having a really hard time living out Jesus' words in Matthew 5. The people closest to me needed a “more than what came naturally to me” sort of love, but I went about it finding that love all the wrong way. Instead of admitting I had come to the end of my natural ability to love and turning to Jesus for help, I picked up a shovel and started digging for the love I needed in my own heart. I was horrified when the shovel hit solid rock. 

Years ago, a poll was taken in the US asking people for their favourite Bible verse. Overwhelmingly, “God helps those who help themselves” came out as number one. The only problem is, it isn’t even in the Bible. In that season of my life, though, I was living as though it was, thinking God wouldn’t help me if I couldn’t even help myself, that I was failing Him if I couldn’t rise to the occasion in my own strength. I let my disappointment in my own weakness drive me away from God.

Instead of reading the Bible more, I read it less, shutting myself off from reminders of God’s promises for me. Instead of praying more, I prayed less, believing that God was as ashamed of me as I was of myself. Why would God want to hear from me, the failure that I was. 

When I found myself weak, I shut myself off from my Source of strength. 

When I disappointed myself, I shut myself off from God’s mercy and grace.

And when I couldn’t accept God’s unconditional love and grace for myself, how would I ever be able to offer that same love and grace to the people in my life?

When we find ourselves unequal to the task in front of us, when we’ve come up against a challenge and failed, the temptation is to retreat.

But instead, hear these words of Jesus today:  

“My grace is all you need.

 My power works best in weakness.”

 (2 Corinthians 12:9 NLT)

 Let’s ask for His strength when we are weak. Let’s ask and ask and never stop asking.